easy breathing

hanging out every weekend in one car filled with 10 people,

sitting down together laughing and play the never ending UNO,

throwing brutal jokes that not everyone can handle,

spending.. christmas..idul fitri or just looongggg weekend
at the same coffee shop,

from attending weddings to experiencing pregnancy and becoming parents,


really do hope the togetherness never ends,

I love you all, may not say it often,
but you're special.

life is really not a fairy tale

Once you're that little girl with rainbow ribbon over your head, running around with your also rainbow tricycle, with your teddy bear stuck fat enough to fill up your basket, and with a smile on your face, you ride the wheel without feeling afraid that somehow there's this slightest chance you might fall down on your knee and hurt your precious sweet innocent skin.
life's just much easier those days.

today, you live life trying so hard not to loose yourself, trying that hard to understand that somehow in just a second, you might feel happiness and sadness at the same time, weird enough..you feel it's so normal, that you don't even bother to give a damn.
til on that predictable day, you realize..that you live your life with too much camouflage, too damn much you'd think it's still your own mind who master all the decisions you make or have made.

in the name of free will, how much actually you would sacrifice living life in disguise and accepting that someone,something, somewhatsoever will never accept you the way you really are? the way you actually want to be, and i repeat the way you actually want to be, not become.

to me, there's no such thing as the perfect fairytale without putting efforts, effort here includes losing your inner will, accepting the nonsense in life, and just try to live life with all the imperfection.

Gosh.. how i want my tricycle back!